


Forgiven

by Burgie



Category: Final Fantasy XIV
Genre: M/M, Male WoL, hrothgar WoL, trans Urianger
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-17
Updated: 2020-08-17
Packaged: 2021-03-06 03:28:03
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,840
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25956745
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Burgie/pseuds/Burgie
Summary: When it seems that all is crumbling down and nothing can be forgiven, Jack is there for his boyfriend.
Relationships: Urianger Augurelt/Warrior of Light
Kudos: 7





	Forgiven

**Author's Note:**

  * For [spotty_lion](https://archiveofourown.org/users/spotty_lion/gifts).



Throughout his career as a member of the Scions of the Seventh Dawn, many a lie, an untruth, had passed Urianger Augurelt’s lips. Many, he knew, had brought about great calamities, though all had been for the greater good. He’d needed to keep telling himself that, in order to still be able to look himself in the eye in the mirror, in order to sleep at night. The pain that his lies had wrought, the spiral of devastation, could almost be too much, at times. And yet, he was somehow able to live with himself. He had to.

This latest lie, though… it had repercussions that he could never have expected. As he returned to the room that he’d rented in the Crystarium before Jack’s words had shattered his heart, Urianger allowed himself to feel that pain. It was too difficult to contain, really. It was all that he could do to close the door behind him before he broke down completely, sliding down with his back to the door into a sitting position, his hands covering his face as he wept. Too much. It was too much, his lie had at last caused irreparable damage. Why had he ever listened to G’raha Tia? He well remembered Cid’s tales of a young Seeker, his dreams too big for him, always ready to do something stupid like this. And now here he was, a man grown, changed by the Tower both physically and mentally, and yet still ever-ready to plunge headlong into a danger. What a fine warrior he may have made, had Hydaelyn blessed him with the Echo. Had his fate not led him to this tower.

But why, why had She seen fit to drag Urianger into this fate too? Was it not enough that he’d already fractured the group the first time, robbing the Scions of their leader? Not enough that he had still had to live with those he’d hurt, that he’d had to see them every damn day? But that was why he’d insisted on remaining at the old Waking Sands, he supposed. To be away from them. For when the worst should happen. He had known that it would happen, he had only not known the how of it. He never could have imagined the way that it had all turned out, in the end. The devastation.

Perhaps this was karma, he supposed as tears ran down his cheeks, sobs torn from his body. His just desserts for all of the pain that he had caused. How fitting, that he who had broken so many hearts should now have his heart broken as the lie had broken apart in such a spectacular way.

A braver man would perhaps have gone after Jack, would have stayed by his side despite Jack clearly not wanting him there. But Urianger had never boasted of being brave. Besides, he would only feel that constant agony, seeing Jack in so much pain and knowing that he was the cause. Hells, even Y’shtola had tried to stop him. Why had he not listened to the woman?

When at last Urianger could bear the pain no longer, he left his room and was surprised to find Jack wandering around the Crystarium, knelt in the rookery where the amaros were kept. Urianger stayed where he was for a moment, marvelling at the sight of Jack, looking so at home here despite the white light burning his fur. He could live here, Urianger knew. Have a good life. With him. If only the circumstances were not so different…

Urianger thought that he could get away with merely watching, that he might lose his nerve and run upstairs to hail an amaro to take him to Il Mheg, but just as he thought to turn away, the amaro that Jack was currently petting raised his head with a ‘khrrr’. It was looking straight at Urianger.

“What is it, Steele?” Jack asked, turning his head to follow the direction that the amaro was looking. He saw the elezen, frozen in place, and Urianger’s heart twisted as a look of relief washed over Jack’s features. “Oh, it’s you.”

“Jack,” said Urianger, uncertain if he was allowed to say Jack’s pet name anymore. He certainly did not deserve that right. “Mine apologies for disturbing thee, I was simply on my way to-”

“You’re not… leaving, are you?” Jack asked, brow furrowed in concern. His one visible eye was almost a milky white colour now, Urianger knew from careful inspection. He wasn’t sure how Jack could even see out of it, or what the world might look like for him.

“Surely, you know as well as I that I no longer have any right to remaineth here,” said Urianger. “Thou must… agree.” Jack must surely be waiting for him to leave, eager for him to get out of here. So then, why was Jack now striding over to him, climbing over the fence surrounding the rookery in his efforts to get closer?

“Don’t go,” said Jack, his voice breaking, his one visible eye wide with concern. “I-I know I was mad at you, and it does still hurt, but- but losing you would hurt even more, Urianger!”

“Tis too late, I am afraid,” Urianger mumbled, casting his eyes downwards. “I hath already made plans to leave here, I no longer have lodgings in the Crystarium. With the many new people arriving here every day, no rooms doth remain for me to continue to stay here.”

“Well, then, I’ll just follow you back to Il Mheg,” said Jack, his hand so gentle, so blazing with Light, as it cupped Urianger’s cheek. Urianger looked up at him.

“Truly?” Urianger asked. “Dost thou truly meaneth that, Jack?”

“Absolutely,” said Jack with a nod. “I was going to take Steele for a flight anyway.”

“Thou hast acquired an amaro, then?” Urianger asked, looking around Jack to the four-winged bird awaiting him in the rookery. Jack nodded, a smile of pride touching his lips. “Legend dictates that an amaro shall only allow a well-seasoned adventurer ‘pon their back, that only he who hath mastered every blade shall ride one.”

“Well, my people weren’t once the Queen’s Blades for nothing,” said Jack with a wry grin. Urianger wanted to hug him, but Jack beat him to it, nuzzling his nose into Urianger's neck, his hair, Urianger closing his eyes as tears slipped from beneath the lids. And Urianger hugged him back just as tightly as apologies began to tumble out. He seemed to spend so much time apologising. First to Jack’s daughter, for being a part of what had torn her first love away from her, for saddling her with the hurt of being reunited with her in such a way. And now, to the man who meant everything to him. Or, at least, one of them. The other man had also had a hand in this, though not as directly as Urianger. He was just as important. And, if Urianger could wish for anything, he would with that Cid could be here too. To marvel at what his company had created, one hundred years in the future. At what they could be capable of.

“Thou truly art amazing, Ladybird,” Urianger whispered, wincing as the pet name passed his lips without any thought. “Mine apologies, I have forgotten myself.”

“Shh, shh, no, I forgive you,” said Jack. “For everything.”

“How?” Urianger asked, his voice shaky. “How canst thou forgive, when thy body burns with the accursed Light that I hath saddled you with? When your days may be numbered, when you may very well become a Lightwarden yourself?”

“Because I don’t want to die angry with you,” said Jack, a tear glimmering like a star in his eye before it trailed down his cheek. It was too bright, like the Light that came up at times, brought up from his lungs, his stomach, to spatter the earth or cloths before him. “I’d sooner die with the two of you by my side, but, failing that… I want your face to be the last that I see. So, please.”

“How can I possibly deny thee that much, when I hath already made thee suffer so much?” said Urianger, resting his forehead against Jack’s chest. The Light burned his eyes, but Jack still smelled as he ever had, only now, overlaid with the scents of amaro. It was a good addition.

“Can I convince you to stay in my inn room for tonight?” Jack asked, rubbing Urianger’s back with such tenderness that tears threatened to overspill golden eyes.

“Would the others not grow… upset at my lingering?” Urianger asked. Truthfully, he’d fully intended to return to the Bookman’s Shelves and pour out his heart to the pixies who always listened and never judged, uncaring about larger issues due to the simple fact of not being able to comprehend the bigger picture. From the souls of babes, indeed.

“You’d be more comfortable in Il Mheg, wouldn’t you?” said Jack, understanding suffusing him with the ease and speed at which he’d grown accustomed to. It had been strange, Urianger had thought the first time it had happened, to have someone understand him so easily and readily. Urianger nodded, sinking into Jack’s warmth, closing his eyes against the blinding Light.

“Thou couldst easily teleport us directly to the aetheryte at Il Mheg,” said Urianger. “If thou hast the strength?” Jack gave him a sad smile.

“I’m afraid to use my magic right now,” said Jack. Urianger’s heart sank at the reminder, a lump in his throat. His fault. It was all-

“I see,” said Urianger. “Mine apologies.”

“Shh,” Jack hushed him once more, rubbing his back with a little more force, trying to calm him, soothe him. “This is as much G’raha’s fault as it is yours.” His daughter, he knew, blamed Hydaelyn. Would that he could blame Emet Selch for her way of thinking. Alas…

“Take my mind off of it?” Urianger asked, cheeks burning as he looked into Jack’s eyes. Jack nodded, understanding flushing a pleasant warmth over him this time, and made his way up the stairs to the Amaro Launch, where Urianger could hire an amaro for himself while Jack had Steele saddled up.

“I have to admit, you sure chose one of the most beautiful places in Norvrandt to settle,” said Jack as they flew. Urianger knew that he was speaking to cover up the knife that twisted in his heart at the Light that now burned over everything once more. He had caused this. They both had.

“I thank thee for saying so,” said Urianger. “I hath ever enjoyed the tales of the fae. When I learned of the land of the fae, I had no choice but to relocate here, to make this my home in this strange land.”

“It suits you,” said Jack. Urianger smiled, cheeks flushing, forgetting, for a moment, the Light burning around them, ripping through Jack’s veins.

All of that, all of those worries, those pains, fell away as the pair descended, leaving their amaros outside of Urianger’s cottage. Though, truly ‘cottage’ was rather a humble term for such a large house. A small group of pixies came out to greet them, exuberantly greeting Urianger and Jack before flitting to examine the amaros.

“Do they talk? Hi! Can you hear me? Gosh, you’re sooo pretty, can I make daisy chains to put around your necks?” the fairies exclaimed, flitting about.

“Don’t worry, I’m sure Steele won’t bite. Much,” said Jack, chuckling as the fairies squealed in delight before darting off to pluck flowers.

“Do give the two of us some privacy!” Urianger called after them.

“We will, Mister Urianger!” the cry came back on the wind, and Urianger smiled fondly.

“You just can’t help being such a father, can you?” said Jack, giving Urianger an equally fond look.

“Mayhap that is mine true calling,” said Urianger. Jack didn’t doubt that.

“You certainly have a knack for it,” said Jack. He pushed open the front doors to the Shelves, almost distressed by the stale air within. He almost wanted to draw the curtains, but… perhaps it would be best, not to look upon the Light for longer than he needed to. Perhaps it would be a temporary reprieve from the blistering Light.

“Would you care for some tea?” Urianger asked. “Assuming that mine pixie friends hath not spirited away my tea things again.” Jack snorted a laugh, easily able to imagine Urianger searching high and low for his messing tea set.

“Actually, I’d prefer to… hold you,” said Jack. “It’s been an age since I’ve simply had you in my arms. I’ve missed it.” Urianger’s eyes misted with tears, which he blinked back.

“Thou truly still wish to hold me?” Urianger asked. “Even after everything? Thou wert so angry.”

“I was,” said Jack. “And I regret the angry words that I said to you every day. You didn’t deserve that. And if there’s any way that I can make it up to you… just say the word, and I will.” He took Urianger’s hands in his own, his face the very picture of sorrow. Urianger cupped Jack’s face in his hands, leaning up on his toes to press a kiss to his snout.

“I never feel more loved than when I have thee deep inside of me,” Urianger murmured, cheeks pinking. “Twould certainly take both of our minds off of the issue at hand, too.”

“I hear that make up sex is almost worth the fight that caused it,” said Jack. He pressed a kiss to Urianger’s neck, the elezen’s breath hitching. Jack continued to kiss a trail down Urianger’s neck, never more grateful that his boyfriend now wore garments that exposed a lot of skin.

“Shall we move to the bed or the sofa?” Urianger asked, wondering if the walk to his bedroom would be too painful a wait.

“Bed,” Jack decided for him, nipping the tip of Urianger’s pointed ear such that his boyfriend groaned deeply in desire. Smiling, Jack pulled Urianger into his arms, able to smell his arousal even with the Light beating through him. One would not expect someone so ill with Light poisoning to even have the desire to do this but, well… Urianger was very hard to say no to. And Jack never knew if this would be the last chance that he’d have to be with Urianger like this.

Ordinarily, Jack would have thrown Urianger onto the bed in his haste, in his eagerness to bury himself inside of him. But this time, he knew that it was different. This time had to be soft and gentle, but also weaving in enough pleasure to ensure that neither of them would fall back into sadness or anger. 

So, instead, Jack lay Urianger on his back on the bed, turning to close the door behind them before turning back around to find that Urianger was already half disrobed, his astrologian garments now on the floor in a tangle of silk and gold, nothing on but his underwear.

“Eager, huh?” Jack huffed a laugh.

“Always, Ladybird,” said Urianger, and Jack’s heart soared at the pet name. He’d snapped at Urianger the first time that he’d said it after the fight with Innocence, and he never stopped feeling guilty about it after the initial rage had subsided. But it was back now, as it should be, spoken from Urianger’s lips. The gentlest caress.

A part of Jack wanted to take this slow, wanted the layers of clothing to fall away as slowly as they dared. But he knew that they were on a timer- at any moment, the Light may overcome him, ending both him and the rest of this part of Norvrandt. The same could happen to any of his friends, he knew. And so, Jack disrobed quickly, his mage robes puddling at his feet before he stepped forward, cock straining against his underwear. Urianger moved to his knees on the bed, reaching for the firm presence of Jack’s cock, tugging down the edge of his underwear as Jack groaned in delight, his cock at last freed. Urianger leaned forward, his tongue swiping over the head of Jack’s cock, and Jack gave a groan of delight. Jack’s hands went to Urianger’s hair, stroking through it, brushing the tips of his ears so that Urianger moaned and shuddered around the tip of Jack’s cock in his mouth.

“Much as I’m loving that, Ducky, I might end up finishing in your mouth before I can even get to you,” said Jack with a laugh. Urianger withdrew immediately, swiping his tongue through the string of saliva still stuck to Jack’s cock.

“Didst thou miss my mouth?” Urianger asked, a smile on his lips.

“More than you can probably believe,” Jack breathed, and leaned forward, pressing kisses to Urianger’s neck, pushing his boyfriend gently down onto his back as he kissed his way down the elezen’s body. Over his scars that marked the start of his new life, over his slim torso, the hidden muscles that Jack knew were there, Jack’s fingers tugging Urianger’s underwear down as he went. And all the time, Jack’s name was falling from Urianger’s lips, softly at first but then with more fervour as Jack got lower, his kisses far more intimate, leaving burning flesh in their wake.

When Jack’s tongue at last parted Urianger’s folds, Urianger fairly trembled, his breath shaking out of him, fingers caught in Jack’s mane. The second pass threatened to break him apart, especially as a purr rumbled from Jack’s throat, the tenderness bringing tears to Urianger’s eyes which spilled over, sliding down into his hair.

“Jack, Jack, Jack,” Urianger wept, and Jack frowned in concern when he raised his head at the sound of tears in his boyfriend’s voice.

“Urianger? What’s wrong?” Jack asked, ears pinning back. Had he hurt him? Was it too much? Not enough?

“Nothing, truly, only that you have stopped,” said Urianger, his eyes still glistening with tears. “I only… never thought to be able to receive such tenderness from you. Certainly not after all that I have done. I am not… deserving of such special treatment.”

“Hm. I disagree with that,” said Jack, leaning in to press a kiss to Urianger’s cheek. “I think that you deserve the world and more. You don’t deserve everything that the world has heaped upon you, all of the hurt and sadness. You deserve love. Kindness. Both things that I will strive to give you until you can take no more.”

“I do not deserve you,” said Urianger, sucking in a shaky breath.

“No,” said Jack, winding his arms around his boyfriend. “I don’t deserve you.” Now, he pressed more kisses to his boyfriend’s skin, tears falling from his own eyes now as he let all of the love that he felt for Urianger bubble to the surface, a potent mixture that could easily spell doom. Were he not of a mind to fall into it, anyway, and to hells with the consequences.

It was with reverence, then, that Jack kissed his way back down Urianger’s body, the tears flowing freely now, neither caring to stop them, no matter how messy it made things. And yet, despite the tears, Urianger still arched his back in pleasure as Jack slipped his tongue inside of Urianger, bringing him untold pleasure, moving it in and out before replacing it with his fingers to stretch his boyfriend open. Though reluctant to feel any pleasure at first, truly believing that he did not deserve it, Urianger soon gave in, opening his legs wider and moaning his pleasure at Jack’s actions, moving his hips, hands curled into Jack’s shoulders, wanting everything that Jack could give him and more.

It was not as rough, this time, as it usually was, when Jack would fuck Urianger until the bed creaked, slamming into his boyfriend over and over. No, this time, he wanted Urianger to feel pampered, adored, to make up for the harsh words that had been hurled his way, to drown out the internal voices that told him that he was to blame for this entire mess. Urianger so easily took blame onto himself, Jack knew. Urianger was a man with the weight of the world on his shoulders, a weight that Jack wished that he could lift and now sought to do, for as long as he was able.

Jack slid inside of Urianger slowly, moaning his enjoyment as Urianger wrapped himself around Jack as best he could, wanting to feel everything possible, to miss out on and forget nothing. And Jack thrust gently at first, not only to enable Urianger to get used to his size again but to bring him nothing but pleasure, a slow burning pleasure that would quickly grow to eclipse everything else.

“I love you,” Jack murmured as he thrust slowly in and out. “So much, and I know that this past week has been rough, but we’ll get through this. Somehow. I may not be able to see the stars as clearly as you do just yet, but I can definitely see a future for us. I want to grow old with you, and Cid, and everyone else in our family. There’s no other option for me, Urianger.” Urianger gave a sob as feeling overflowed, full of both Jack and his own emotions.

“Truly?” Urianger asked, eyes gleaming. Jack nodded. Urianger still looked so beautiful, even through the film of Light that tried to blind him. But it wouldn’t be the first time that the universe had tried to blind him.

“Yes,” said Jack, leaning down to press a kiss to Urianger’s forehead, nudging a sensitive spot inside of him as he did so that made Urianger gasp. He continued to nudge into this spot, blowing his boyfriend’s mind as he murmured sweet nothings into his ear. Urianger was half sobbing by the time that he reached his climax, legs wrapped around his boyfriend so tightly that they trembled.

“Oh, Jack, never doubt that I love thee,” said Urianger, panting, barely able to compose himself as his body trembled with the aftershocks of his orgasm. “I love thee such that I can scarce stand to be apart from thee.”

“I love you too,” said Jack, continuing to thrust into his boyfriend, the emotion and pleasure tangling together to push him closer to the edge. “I love you so much, Urianger. Never doubt that.” He thrust forward again, crying out as his knot formed, sealing the two of them together. Jack kissed Urianger so tenderly, on his cheeks and forehead. “And I forgive you. Even if nobody else does.”

“Thank you,” Urianger whispered, his voice choked. “Thank you. And I forgive thee for snapping. I cannot think that I would do any differently, were I in your position.” He didn’t know if he’d have the strength to even keep going in Jack’s position. But Jack was strong. Just one of the many things that Urianger loved about him.


End file.
